3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
My vagina just clenched in fear
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