Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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