So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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