The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
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