I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
