Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
