we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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