lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
he shaved USA in his pubs
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
