i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
