Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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