Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
