Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
