Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize