I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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