so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize