Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize