Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
When are your genitals available?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
