i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
