Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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