What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I want to be your penis for a week.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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