VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize