There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
We talked him into tasing himself.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
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