i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
