Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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