Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
