how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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