did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
