i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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