pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
