Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
