When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
