It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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