I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize