If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
