Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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