I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
