i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
