She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
