I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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