Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Terrible idea I love it
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
