Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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