did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
