Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
