i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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