Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
