Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize
