KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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