we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
