To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
