I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Randomize
