I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
